Existential thoughts during a depersonalization episode are no joke. They rattle the very core of your being. No one knows where these thoughts come from. Suddenly, you feel like you are peering through a crack in the universe and you do not like what you see. You feel like you are losing control with these questions. Mar 11, 2017 · After all, as human beings, we are built to question our own existence. Existential anxiety is just that, the undeniable struggle to understand who you are and what you want out of life. And that’s just a small portion of this struggle. Mar 21, 2018 · Existential OCD and Derealization - posted in Discussion: I’m a 35 year old male and I’ve had OCD my entire life. My OCD has taken on many forms since I was a child, starting with the classic germ/handwashing stuff, then counting, then certain words were good or bad, and at some point in high school it turned into religious OCD, having to say certain prayers over and over again, etc ... OCD is insidious, as it seems to have a way of finding out what will bother someone the most. Most sufferers wear themselves out trying to find answers, or try to get the thoughts out of their heads, but these are the worst ways to deal with OCD. As mentioned previously, there are no answers to existential or any other obsessive questions.